Always Thank the Bus Driver

I am continually astonished by the way I see people treat others, particularly those in service-type roles. Bus drivers, mail deliverers, kiosk workers, retail attendees, janitors, airline flight attendants and supermarket check out assistants are among the biggest targets for rude behaviour and this has to change. I used to commute to work by taking a train and then taking a bus service; It is a very popular bus (I worked at a university) and there were always lines of people standing - bored, untalking, unmoving, at the train station bus stop waiting for the bus to the university and, of course, there were always lines of people at the university waiting for the bus going back to the train. Day after day I commuted with dozens of passengers and day after day I watched most of them get on the bus without making eye contact or acknowledging the driver, and at the end of the trip they got off silently, as if the bus was merely an inconvenience, an obstacle in their schedule and not driven by a thinking, feeling, breathing human being. I am a rare breed of passenger indeed, because without fail I always smile and say a quick hello as I get on and I always call out a thank you as I leave the bus.

I'm not trying to morally shame anyone, but it does interest me how we as a society got to this point. It would feel totally unnatural for me not to acknowledge the person serving me and I truly wonder why others don't feel the same. It is so easy in the modern day to get caught up in a narcissistic loop of self-gratification, it is easy to feel as though you are the centre of the universe and everyone else is in between you and the next thing you've got to do, merely an inconvenience, merely an obstacle. And, it is also easy to simply forget altogether that you are right here in this moment in this world on this bus with these people because our minds are constantly dwelling in whichever cyber world we've got open on the device in our hands. In the current era, the importance of etiquette and social norms have disintegrated as we live in a faster paced world than ever before. In a world full of distractions, sometimes its really important to stop and see the person in front of you. Really see them. See them as a human being, a person with desires and needs, yes it may be their job to get you from A to B but that doesn't mean what they're doing shouldn't be valued and appreciated. If people who worked in service roles suddenly disappeared we would be absolutely left in the lurch. But it's not just the job they do that makes them worthwhile, they are worthwhile because they're human, just like you, and just like me.

Ironically, there are also plenty of self-centred reasons why being polite and kind to others throughout your daily life is important - according to a series of studies headed by Julianne Holt-Lunstad the amount to which people interact with all the other people that cross their path throughout the day (mail deliverers, check out assistants, baristas,passers-by on the street or at the park) - called 'social integration' was linked to their chances of living longer/staying alive throughout the trial; and in fact was the biggest factor that effected their outcome. Learn about that in the Ted talk by Susan Pinker here: (Skip to 7 minutes in for the discussion about this) 

it is important to see every person in your day as a human being and not as an object put there to do something for you or as an obstacle you must get through to reach your next task. I advocate extending a little bit of kindness to the bus driver, or whomever might be in a service role the next time you come across them. It does not cost anything to smile and say hello, please, or thank you. Don't forget that you don't know what those people might be going through - aim to make sure your impact on people is as often as possible a positive one. A small show of kindness can change the tone of a person's day. Kindness and positivity are contagious - just as negativity is. You don't know whether your smile and your thanks led to that person extending kindness to their neighbour or their next customer that day.  Our actions have ripples that go on way beyond the results we immediately see; try to make sure yours bring goodness into the world, not the opposite. You don't have to go out of your way to do this, you can do it almost effortlessly as you go about your day. It's as simple as a thank you.

Don't let people feel ignored; make them feel valued, seen, appreciated. It's simple and it's vital. Always thank the bus driver.